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13 thoughts on “Share Your Story”
Hey Guys just want to tell you my story as it hasn’t been easy but I know it has a good ending. Was involved around violence time & time again but was lucky that I have a supportive family on my mother’s side even if I had to be in the hospital several times in my early years after watching my mother get beaten then find out later that her 2nd husband was an alcoholic. Mental Illness has played a huge role in my life as there are certain places that I’ll only go to knowing how devastating alcoholism & drug addiction can become while eating away at other family members like myself. I never cared about the fact that I’ve had to take meds but realize they’re there for me & my mental health even if I have over 15 years in 2 different 12-step groups & 3 in a 3rd as I’ve snapped when people that had problems with their diseases became violent , have stolen from the family, or have relapsed remembering that if I had a choice I would’ve thrown my nephew down the stairs even if it meant me going to jail to make sure that he wouldn’t steal anything. I actually haven’t been in the hospital for over 10 years & worked a job for almost 21 years while living near Chicago which kept me sane as there was a 6 year period that a doctor approved my getting off meds after I had started my 1st program as I never was referred to any of my programs by a psychiatrist. In June 2004 things started getting rough as there were times that I had thoughts of possibly hurting the person that became abusive toward female relatives of mine for years as I again never cared about seeing someone get abused but at that time my stepfather had been sober almost 11 years but was nearing death. For me moving away from home in November of 2005 really helped as I wanted nothing to do with alcohol & drugs after switching religions as well from being Lutheran to becoming Catholic as having my own identity has really helped as well as I still have numerous friends around me from back home who I call periodically & will call several family members as well. Having been around my programs has helped me & I know I’ll be around them for life whether it’s dealing with my emotions or family that’s been addicted to alcohol & or drugs. The good thing is that I never got addicted to any of it knowing it would’ve intensified the effect of the medicine I’ve been on & after being around the amount of alcoholism that I was I knew that it was time to go & start over
Hey Guys just want to tell you my story as it hasn’t been easy but I know it has a good ending. Was involved around violence time & time again but was lucky that I have a supportive family on my mother’s side even if I had to be in the hospital several times in my early years after watching my mother get beaten then find out later that her 2nd husband was an alcoholic. Mental Illness has played a huge role in my life as there are certain places that I’ll only go to knowing how devastating alcoholism & drug addiction can become while eating away at other family members like myself. I never cared about the fact that I’ve had to take meds but realize they’re there for me & my mental health even if I have over 15 years in 2 different 12-step groups & 3 in a 3rd as I’ve snapped when people that had problems with their diseases became violent , have stolen from the family, or have relapsed remembering that if I had a choice I would’ve thrown my nephew down the stairs even if it meant me going to jail to make sure that he wouldn’t steal anything
6 years ago, I would have never seen the place I’m in today. I would have never thought I’d be able to get out of bed, go into town, look someone in the eye.. or even smile a real smile again. I never could have seen myself doing what I’m doing today. 6 years ago, is when this all started. Things happened in my family life and it seemed the rest of my life fell apart with it. As my family started hitting bumps in the road, so did I. I let my grades slip, tried my best to skip school whenever I could. I self harmed, was on 7 different medications at the same time. February 28th, 2013 is the first time I hit rock bottom. Ending up on the ground, after shoving so many medications down my throat. My mother took my to the ER, and I was immediately rushed to the Aurora Pavilion in Aiken, SC. They done nothing for me, gave me a medication that made me sleep for the 3 days that I was there. Let the other kids make fun of me, let them make me cry… and since I was on voluntary send, I called my mom and we decided we could do our best with my issues at home. Well, we found a counselor got a new doctor, new medications. It went good for a while.. thought everything was going to work out. Until I went back to school in September 2013. The kids at my school, made my everyday a living hell. Pushed me to make the wrong decisions, made me cry in the middle of the day. Pretty much ruined my life. So they continued it, until Tuesday March 11th of 2014. My mom found me in the bathtub, on the verge of life and death. She picked me up, and breathe life into me like she done it daily and rushed me to the ER once again. Here – is where I made the most life changing decision. I said yes, on an involuntary transport to the adolescent center at William S. Hall in Columbia, SC. The people there, took me off my medicines, put my by myself.. and honestly – let me go completely crazy. 3 days after they had experienced my worse panic attacks, highest waves of depression, and my meanest spell of bipolar.. they set me on new medications and watched me for 2 more weeks as I blossomed into the same girl I had been 5 years earlier. As I was released on the 25th of March in 2014, I walked out with a new hope. A hope to make something of myself, to become someone, and to never let my mental state defeat me again. Now, here I am.. 15 years old. No more medications, no more outbursts of sadness. It’s still here, not completely gone.. but those people changed me and I am different again. I am successful, I was not all the way defeated, and I am stronger than I’ve ever been before.
Just Perfect
If three years ago people would have told me that everything would get better, I would have merely nodded my head while screaming my disbelief on the inside. I thought things simply could not get better, that I’d be forever trapped in the dark room I felt myself imprisoned inside. While my friends went out, I chose to remain home. When I attended parties, I could not help but think that I’d have had a better time on my own. Even when I was surrounded by others, I felt like a bubble shut me out, like I was somehow different from all the others. And even when I found myself in the Intensive Care department of the hospital, I still could not bring myself to reclaiming my life.
Do you ever feel that way? Well, you are not alone. It took time, but even I, so skeptical at first, learned to envision a recovery. And I envisioned myself writing about this recovery, helping others get on top of things even if at that moment I was not quite sure whether I, myself, would.
My name is Hanne, and I battled my inner demons for over four years. I thought I wanted to be perfect, but it turns out that I never quite knew what that really was.
I am also a survivor, the living proof that if you put your mind to it you, too, can survive and overcome your struggles. If I can do it, so can you. I believe in you. I believe in recovery.
Because of this same reason, I wrote a novel entitled “Just Perfect.” It is a novel that finds its roots in the difficult times I have gone through, and it took me more than three years to write. But it was worth it. It’s definitively worth it. Meant to inspire and help others through the sharing of my personal struggles – experienced by so many others as well -, I believe it would be incredible to share my work with the largest audience possible to convince people of the fact that they are not alone and that they, too, have things worth fighting for.
If you are interested in checking out “Just Perfect” (I hope with all of my heart that it will help you on your road to recovery) you can find it here: https://www.createspace.com/4888416 (hardcopy) and http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00QHCWQC0 (Kindle version)
Not only would I, in this way, be able to help others, it would also lift a heavy burden off of my shoulders. Yes, indeed, there were several things that were vital in my recovery, things I could not have survived without. And penning down my thoughts and battles were vital. On top of this, the incessant help of my family was vital. Without them, without being able to share my story with them (particularly my parents and twin sister), I would not have been able to fight as bravely through this struggle as I did. Because you can’t win a battle on your own, and I urge you to find that person to open your heart to.
Writing was the second-most important aspect in my recovery, and it may work for you as well if you give it a try. Take just five minutes each night or fifteen minutes each week – find a time that fits for you – and pen down the thoughts, feelings and events that you encountered during the day. Make sure to note down the positives and the things you are proud of, and repeat them to yourself. Because you are unique, and you are special and talented in your own way.
I mentioned the need to get your story off of your chest – please don’t keep it locked up inside of yourself – and, therefore, if you have anything you want to discuss or need to let go off, I hereby offer you my ears in case you feel the need. Because I know you are worth fighting for. I’m sure of it. To all the fighters, don’t give up, and don’t be afraid to reach out to others and to talk to family, friends, or a professional. I know you can do it – build trust in yourself and make it happen!
Thank you very much for providing the opportunity to submit a personal story. I hope it will be helpful to the visitors of the website.
-Lisa
Thanks, Lisa for posting your story of daily recovery and also for your words of encouragement.
-Jon
-Brianna
-Jennifer
-Cathy
— Marissa
— Angela
— Kate